I am at peace with being single. No, really. It’s cool. I am appreciating all of the extra time I have to focus on my creative pursuits/drinking.

This announcement should not be construed as a cheap attempt to use reverse psychology on the Universe. The Universe is far too clever and would instantly pierce through such a flimsy façade. The Universe is also looking mighty fine in that dress tonight. You been working out?

Ahem.

Being single is awesome.

That is all.