One of the first things I did when I got to Austin was to sign up for interesting groups at Meetup.com. I get to meet people with similar interests and check out cool new places in Austin.

Right now I’m part of  Discovering Austin, a couple wine/coffee/singles Meetup groups, a sushi group, two Landmark groups, and two movie groups. One of the movie groups is the Alamo Drafthouse Fans, which I am an assistant organizer for. That means I get to pick movies, schedule events and get people to come to the Alamo to have a good time!

As a Christmas gift for myself, I had signed up for the “It’s Just Lunch” dating service for busy professionals. I describe the person I am looking for and the company tries to match me up with someone looking for me. They make reservations at a night restaurant for lunch or after work drinks and I go on a blind date.

This process enabled me to articulate the sort of woman I enjoy spending time with. I told them I liked quirky, creative types who had a spiritual dimension to them, who were honest and expressive. I stressed that it be made known that I was a big movie geek and enjoyed lots of geeky activities. Potential dates should know what they are in for!

For the most part, the service set me up with really nice women who were pretty. But there was never really a spark and oftentimes they were fairly mainstream. They wanted to talk about what we did for a living, not about life goals and plans or being self-expressive.

Originally, I signed up with the intention of finding someone to date. After moving to Austin, I revised that intention as I now just wanted to meet some new people and get acquainted with the city. I gradually came to terms with the fact that I really wanted to find someone to have a serious relationship. I didn’t want to casually date anyone. I wanted to create the possibility of a lasting, loving partnership. While I tried to stay open to the possibility of meeting such a person through a dating service, I felt like I wasn’t going to meet that person in such a way. I thought, “Maybe the person I’m attracted to would never use a dating service or they wouldn’t spend this much money on it.”

So I became cautiously optimistic, but extremely picky. I can see the value of such a service, but I’m not sure if it is the right thing for me.